Infant sleep on the internet is a rabbit hole. Jump in and you’ll get opinions from everyone ranging from paediatricians to your great Aunt on your Facebook comments.
You can stop your late night googling because I’ve put together 5 of the biggest myths as a baby sleep specialist that I help my clients rewrite in their parental brain, so that they can ditch the stress and enjoy their baby.
- Myth: Babies should sleep through the night.
Fact: It is normal and expected for babies to wake up during the night for a feed or for comfort throughout infancy (the first 3 years!). Babies have small stomachs and need to eat frequently, which can lead to waking multiple times per night. Sleep patterns also vary widely among babies, and the baseline for one baby’s sleep will be very different to another’s.
- Myth: Babies should nap for long periods of time.
Fact: While some babies may take long naps, it is also common for babies to take shorter naps throughout the day. Some babies are what’s termed lower sleep needs babies, and for these kiddo’s a long nap can mean a disrupted night. Other babies may just have a natural pattern of short naps, which is fine and their normal.
- Myth: Babies should always fall asleep on their own.
Fact: Self-soothing is a term that is commonly used to describe a baby’s ability to calm themselves down when they are upset or need to fall asleep. It is however a term that has been taken out of context. Self-soothing is not something that can be taught or trained, but rather emerges naturally as babies become more independent and learn to regulate their emotions, which for some is well into childhood. Furthermore, many babies who are supported to sleep will sleep through the night just as many babies who fall asleep independently will wake for a feed or for comfort.
- Myth: Babies who sleep more are healthier.
Fact: The evidence does not support the link between consolidated sleep and cognitive development, especially in the first 12 months. The messaging that babies who wake are being developmentally disadvantaged are not evidence-based and place a huge amount of pressure on parents whose babies are sleeping well within the spectrum of normal infant sleep.
- Myth: Babies don’t need night feeds over a certain age or weight.
Fact: Age and weight have zero standing on when a baby should no longer need to feed overnight. While some babies may start sleeping for longer periods at night as they get older and their stomachs grow, many infants still require night feeds, especially during growth spurts and periods of development. It’s important for parents to respond to their baby’s hunger and comfort cues as needed. Once over 12m, I am an advocate for making changes to the overnight feeding relationship only when a parent wants to make a change, but never because they think they should.
The next time you hear one of these 5 myths being passed around your mother’s group, help another mum out and let her know that this is a heck of a lot of pressure to put on herself, and it’s ok to just *let it go*.
